Relationships - Second Edition
August 18, 2024
Here we are. Last time I wrote about relationships was about 2 years ago. Man, have I learned a few things since then. Gained perspective, for sure. Here are some of my thoughts:
People complement, rather than complete, my life. I am whole in Christ, everyone who is in my life at the time will add to it in some capacity, either in the form of encouragement and value or in the form of a lesson. Maybe both. Growth in some way shape or form. Anyone who is no longer in my life is not meant to be, and I can simultaneously appreciate what they were at some point in time and how they shaped who I am.
Psalm 34:10 “… but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing.” Psalm 84:11-12: “… No good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly. O Lord of hosts, blessed is the one who trusts in you!“ I believe these with my whole heart. Regarding relationships, opportunities, anything, really.
People come and go. Sometimes, the reason for absence may never be known, and that’s okay. It doesn’t make that person bad for leaving, it simply means that you are both living your lives, and at one moment moving forward, it wasn’t the best for both of you to be a part of each other’s life.
I believe it to be everyone’s goal to find the best for them. It's not better than a past relationship or person. Better for them. So, if I am not better for someone than someone else would be for them, by all means, I don’t want to be involved with that person, and I wish them the best. On a broader scale, I believe it to be an honor that I can be a part of others’ lives, even if just for a moment. How fascinating and beautiful it is that I can be a piece of someone’s journey in finding what is right for them, even if it is not me? I can only hope that there are fractions of things I bring to the table that could positively add to someone’s life, maybe even make a lasting impact. Maybe I bring encouragement, maybe I bring a lesson, perhaps both.
Closure is an interesting idea. I think sometimes it’s a false pretense that we need this sense of closure, the concept of it creeping into the root of a desire for control. Controlling how something will pan out, ‘needing’ a conversation or a situation to occur and look a certain way so that we feel this sense of comfort, rather than trusting the Lord in what he has and how he controls aspects of our lives. He wants us to look and cling to Him for that sense of comfort.
No one has an obligation to be on the same page as another. However, I believe we do owe it to people to communicate which page we are on compared to them, especially if it seems to be different.
And people respond much differently to situations. One response is not better or worse than another. Simply different.
You cannot control others’ perspectives. It is a waste of time to try and articulate things perfectly so that someone may receive what you say or do in exactly the way you meant for it to be delivered. They may never see it like you do. They may never know your intentions or your true thoughts, just as you may never know theirs. You are not them. You don’t think like them. It’s beautifully different, the way we operate, think, feel, suppress, express, …
Just a little update.
To be continued, most likely…
